In the previous post aku ada mention aku gi lambat exam and then fail kan? Sebelum fail ni aku nak share la apa jadik dekat aku pada hari kejadian. Sumpah aku jahilliyah gila aku rasa bangang rasa nak givap masa benda tu terjadi
So macam ni. Aku study la cukup2 paper family law II ni. Banyak-2 paper ko sangkut family kan? Bagus. So aku study la malam tu and aku rasa aku ter-over konfiden and aku main kat twitter for like an hour (or more, aku rasa tak lama pun) sebab aku rasa aku dah prepared and nak get rid of that rasa nervous. And ko tau tak, aku set alarm semua berbondong- bondong beghiya nak rak tapi aku tak bagi tau seseorang kehidupan se-seekor nyawa ke apa pun yang aku ada paper esok pagi. APE KE BODOHNYA. ha kena taip besar-besar untuk mengingatkan betapa bodohnya ku.
aku tido dalam kul 4 camtu and expect to bangun subuh mandi semua and then baca-baca la before exam. Guess what I woke up at 10:30 am and my paper was at 9am. Nak gugur gila bavi jantung aku masa tu weh. Masa aku bangun tu aku dah rasa lain macam sebab aku rasa Puas Tido, and bukak-bukak mata dah terang. Aku dah istighfar jugak masa tu and still trying to get myself composed.
pastu aku terus kejut kawan aku like kawan rapat kat bilik sebelah and her nickname was "Mummy" and aku cakap "mummy I'm here" like we were both so shocked and she immediately asked me to call my other friend and she called another friend. I also called some lecturers to ask if I can sit the paper on another date and not a living life can tell me that because they themselves don't know.
aku ingat pesan ayah aku "this is your last chance and I won't help u anymore" aku ingat gila-gila and pasal tu aku determined to enter the exam hall.
so luckily my other friend was available and her housemate sent me to the venue. So aku berlari masuk dewan exam I was desperately looking for my seat and some lecturers also recognized me and some even called my name. I binge looking for my seat because I have only a short time to spare. You know what I think luck was on my side when I found my other friends this God-sent lecturer passed me the question paper when other lecturers are "discussing" if I can sit for the paper.
I was mildly disappointed like man............... I rushed in there. I refused to think about everything else and I tried coming in man. I did everything I could and at least u cld do is helping me, the desperate me because we don't even know in the future if our beloved ones might need the same / similar kind of help.... nevertheless, ya I sat for 1 hour and 15 minutes more or less, and I got (my failed grade). That grade was a pretty impressive grade, personally, for me because I answered a 3-hour paper in 1 hour and-something-minutes man.
honestly it was devastating, yeah i was a devastated hooman and I still hoped everything will be fine anyway.. so I went back home to my rented house and packed to go back to my hometown
moral of the story:
(1) try everything you can and do what ever you can to save yourself, go for things that you think is right and screw everything else. avoid negative thinking -- i mean i could just give up that day man? but i tried to not be panic and sit for the paper and prayed for the best. I think if you're positive Allah will help you. insyaAllah
(2) kalau nak exam tu tolong bagitau semua orang that you have an exam (especially morning examination cases and engko memang tak reti bangon pagi) and u need someone to wake you up just ASK FOR THEIR HELP DARN IT
(3) pray. keep praying + solat hajat is a must but still it has to be accompanied with redha, tawakal and let the solat tell u that yang hanya boleh menunaikan hajat kamu adalah Allah semata-mata
(4) segala yang berlaku kepada kamu baik atau buruk ada hikmahnya. so be patient and He will tell you.